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Thread: Casual Discourse's Fortress of Dwarves

  1. #1
    ))) joke, relax ;) coqauvin's Avatar
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    Default Casual Discourse's Fortress of Dwarves

    I decided, against my better judgment, to download and play Dwarf Fortress once again. I never really got into it the first time, but I'm tired of Minecraft and still want to build weird things, or just get destroyed by all the Fun that lurks around every corner.

    I'm not going to play a pass-along game, but I am going to involve CD members as my dwarves. I've picked myself, the richest member (KT., instead of #ESATgogogogo because his name won't work), the most reputable (simonj), the most vocal (or post-whorious, ironically this is sycld), the guy who won sheep 2 (infernus), satori_everything because she pretty much epitomizes dorfiness and Vengeful Scars just because.

    The group consists of 7 dwarves with varied abilities and a bunch of shit they need to survive in a stupidly complicated world. The name of the group is the "Merchant of Comets" because fuck yeah and the name of our CD Dwarf Fort is "Idletalks the Council of Flames"

    Here is a random collection of facts about our 7, hearty dorfs:

    coqauvin (brokerminer)


    sycld (Mechaminer)


    satori_everything (MasonCraft)


    KT. (Cutter Crafter Builder)


    Vengeful Scars (Food Bitch)


    simonj (MilitialWoodcutter)


    infernus (Hunter)


    With this introduced, when I get time, I will screenshot the fortress once a game year and write stories about the dwarves who survive and how they'll all end up dead anyways.

    Quote Originally Posted by Nermy2k View Post
    yeah obviously we'd all suck our alternate universe dicks there was never any question about that
    Quote Originally Posted by Atmosfear
    I don't know if Obama did anything to make that happen, but I do know that he didn't do anything to stop me from blaming him.

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    Senior Member ShitFace's Avatar
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    Um, I have more credits than KT. thank you very much.

    I don't think this is a decent post addressing coqauvin's thread or Dwarf Fortress. Maybe if was humorous, something pertinent to Dwarf Fortress, then I would have been okay with it. If you want you can come back and edit this thread and add more. Anything. It doesn't have to be humorous, but if you could make your posts more contributing then you would be taking a step in the right direction. -Mad Pino Rage
    Andy says:
    prince of persia is more skill than hack and slash
    ShitFace says:
    i dont think skill is a genre of game lol
    Andy says:
    of course it is you have seen the crystal maze havnt you?
    he says what next a skill physical mental?


    Blind people don't see black, they see the same thing you see out of your elbow - VengfulScars

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    A very manly muppet Mad Pino Rage's Avatar
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    Cool

    This looks very exciting. I'm vaguely familiar with the game. I've seen a few threads on other forums that make up some cool stories to go along with gameplay. I think the most memorable one was something about a whole fortress of dwarves ransacked by dragons, and a few remaining non-combat dwarves walled themselves off.

    I look forward to reading the adventure as it unfolds. I want to do something like this with Civilization 5 .
    Unthinking respect for authority is the greatest enemy of truth.
    Albert Einstein

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    Senior Member crapoo16's Avatar
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    Well I think his comment was just towards how coaq picked KT (the richest member).

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    ))) joke, relax ;) coqauvin's Avatar
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    between KT's current credits and what's held in her offshore spambot account in the Cayman's, I'm pretty sure she's the winner.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nermy2k View Post
    yeah obviously we'd all suck our alternate universe dicks there was never any question about that
    Quote Originally Posted by Atmosfear
    I don't know if Obama did anything to make that happen, but I do know that he didn't do anything to stop me from blaming him.

  6. #6
    Senior Member ShitFace's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by crapoo16 View Post
    Well I think his comment was just towards how coaq picked KT (the richest member).
    this, also i was being humourous, i wasn't seriously digging at coq lol...
    Andy says:
    prince of persia is more skill than hack and slash
    ShitFace says:
    i dont think skill is a genre of game lol
    Andy says:
    of course it is you have seen the crystal maze havnt you?
    he says what next a skill physical mental?


    Blind people don't see black, they see the same thing you see out of your elbow - VengfulScars

  7. #7
    ))) joke, relax ;) coqauvin's Avatar
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    Update #1

    I think my girlfriend (or her cat) turned off my computer before I'd saved the notes I was taking, but not a heck of a lot has occured thus far.

    The first announcement was that our intrepid caravan was sharing this mountain side with a weretortoise:



    He lives in his cave beside the skeleton of the 1 thing he's killed. The weird part is that the clothes are scattered all over the cave. Everywhere. I don't know if this weretortoise just carries this guys clothes around (petting them, naming them, sniffing them "oh it smells like Kosoth Bisekgusil!") or if he lured the other dwarf in with promises of sexytimes, got him mostly undressed before turning into his half-man, half-tortoise alter ego and tearing that guy apart.

    Whatever the case is, the monster's stayed in his cave with his toys for a full season, so I'm not too worried about him yet. I'll send simonj over there eventually with a squad to kill him and lay that skeleton to rest.

    I spent a long, long time trying to arrange the fortress. I decided to make the main entrance a trap filled hallway with stairs leading up to the main fort (that can be removed to seal all the dwarves in). There will be an airlock of sorts that will lead to the trade depot, so we can successfully haul out all the useless shit satori makes and get some $$$$$ for it. bitches (and dwarves) love $$$$$.

    Here's a small tour of our new home:



    This is the first floor. I've got a short hallway that will get twisty and crazy with traps! Traps everywhere! Mostly because I don't entirely trust simonj to build an effective military. I've got a shitty dirt road leading to the trade depot, but I'll install a drawbridge once I find the time/inclination to.



    This is the main floor. Section 1 is currently the storage area for furniture and food, with the very top section containing a still for VS to make all our booze and leading up into the farm plot/pen for animals to slaughter treat lovingly. Section 2 is the work space. It's got some storage for all the crafts satori makes, a gem shop, a masonry shop (for furniture) and a mechanics shop so sycld can help us build a ton of traps. Section 3, when it gets dug out, will be the main hall, with the original 7 having spots of honour across the main section and the rest being filled with statues and shit.



    this is the bedrooms, with a few lazy layabouts names already for being jerks. The northmost square is seed/produce storage + the farm plots, the centre section will be sqared off, walled off and filled with livestock and the unbuilt section will be a barracks for all newcomers. because fuck migrants.

    I built a still and summoned VS to go brew us the desperately needed alcohol, but he was too busy chillaxing on a grassy knoll to bother. He stayed there for quite a while, too:



    I charted out all the 7 dwarves relations (friends/acquaintances), but lost that info, so all I have left is a picture of satori_everything having no friends at all:



    I think infernus is the most popular at this point, having 4 friends out of a possible 6. KT. and sycld are tied for second worst with 1 friend each.

    ***

    The only other real event thus far is infernus is the weirdest hunter in the world. He went out and killed a stork. Somewhere in the process of him dragging it back, he was attacked by a second stork. He hit it a couple times and managed to lodge a bolt in it's leg. In the stork's pain, it fell unconcious. Infernus decided that this was a good time for a nap. I cruise on over, and there's the passed out stork and infernus fast asleep, surrounded by blood, corpses and bolts.



    The stork was pretty fucked up too, covered in blood and vomit with two broken wings and an arrow to the knee:



    After they both woke up there was a violent Benny Hill scene with infernus missing shot after shot and the stork worming its way across the ground with broken wings, broken legs, a broken spine and ruptured right kidney and stomch. Eventually the kill was made and, in true white man fashion, infernus said he was out of ammo, ran to the stockpile and then fucked off inside for a drink, leaving both corpses lying on the ground. A month later, they're still kjust laying out there, and I don't know how to get anyone to go and grab them.

    When summer came around, we got 5 new migrants:



    We have a clothier, a fisherdwarf and a milker, with the two at the top being useless children, likely only to be kidnapped by goblins. The only water on the map, so far, is murky pools with no fish in it, so a fisher industry is out of the question (looks like someone's a hauler bitch now!). The milker could be useful, I think we have milkable animals in our livestock, and prepared meals make dwarves real happy. We have no source of thread and thus no textile industry at the moment, but I think it's not too hard to set up with farm plots and whatnot.

    Anyways, this has been Spring 1 of Idletalks: tune in for the next season!
    Quote Originally Posted by Nermy2k View Post
    yeah obviously we'd all suck our alternate universe dicks there was never any question about that
    Quote Originally Posted by Atmosfear
    I don't know if Obama did anything to make that happen, but I do know that he didn't do anything to stop me from blaming him.

  8. #8
    Senior Member Infernus's Avatar
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    haha thats funny


    did they update dwarf fortress or is that a graphic mod

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    Senior Member ShitFace's Avatar
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    this is brilliant.
    Andy says:
    prince of persia is more skill than hack and slash
    ShitFace says:
    i dont think skill is a genre of game lol
    Andy says:
    of course it is you have seen the crystal maze havnt you?
    he says what next a skill physical mental?


    Blind people don't see black, they see the same thing you see out of your elbow - VengfulScars

  10. #10
    Sexual Deviant Vengeful Scars's Avatar
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    Infernus takes a nap in between kills. I nod out, and can't be bothered to make us some rum.

    This is awesome, can't wait for a new one.
    lik dis if u cry evertim
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. E View Post
    yes
    Quote Originally Posted by KT. View Post
    Oh I was expecting a guide to making meth

  11. #11
    Senior Member ShitFace's Avatar
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    so wheres the update
    Andy says:
    prince of persia is more skill than hack and slash
    ShitFace says:
    i dont think skill is a genre of game lol
    Andy says:
    of course it is you have seen the crystal maze havnt you?
    he says what next a skill physical mental?


    Blind people don't see black, they see the same thing you see out of your elbow - VengfulScars

  12. #12
    ))) joke, relax ;) coqauvin's Avatar
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    sorry guys, school's been crazy - you'll have one soon(tm)
    Quote Originally Posted by Nermy2k View Post
    yeah obviously we'd all suck our alternate universe dicks there was never any question about that
    Quote Originally Posted by Atmosfear
    I don't know if Obama did anything to make that happen, but I do know that he didn't do anything to stop me from blaming him.

  13. #13
    Sexual Deviant Vengeful Scars's Avatar
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    you'll have one soon is trademarked?

    I can't wait to see what my fatass does next time, I'll probably nod out on the job and kill everyone.
    lik dis if u cry evertim
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. E View Post
    yes
    Quote Originally Posted by KT. View Post
    Oh I was expecting a guide to making meth

  14. #14
    ))) joke, relax ;) coqauvin's Avatar
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    part of the problem is i got 2 waves on my last round of playing so i'm figuring out how to talk about 40~ dwarves (seriously, our crafts aren't even worth that much) without going into micromanaging
    Quote Originally Posted by Nermy2k View Post
    yeah obviously we'd all suck our alternate universe dicks there was never any question about that
    Quote Originally Posted by Atmosfear
    I don't know if Obama did anything to make that happen, but I do know that he didn't do anything to stop me from blaming him.

  15. #15
    A very manly muppet Mad Pino Rage's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by coqauvin View Post
    part of the problem is i got 2 waves on my last round of playing so i'm figuring out how to talk about 40~ dwarves (seriously, our crafts aren't even worth that much) without going into micromanaging
    Wow! The games seems like it has so much to offer. I'm kinda wanting to pick it up now. Great thread and pretty interesting read.
    Unthinking respect for authority is the greatest enemy of truth.
    Albert Einstein

  16. #16
    ))) joke, relax ;) coqauvin's Avatar
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    soon, i promise. Probably not until after the 17th, but from there definitely
    Quote Originally Posted by Nermy2k View Post
    yeah obviously we'd all suck our alternate universe dicks there was never any question about that
    Quote Originally Posted by Atmosfear
    I don't know if Obama did anything to make that happen, but I do know that he didn't do anything to stop me from blaming him.

  17. #17
    Senior Member ShitFace's Avatar
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    came here ready to rep you and left disappointed.
    Andy says:
    prince of persia is more skill than hack and slash
    ShitFace says:
    i dont think skill is a genre of game lol
    Andy says:
    of course it is you have seen the crystal maze havnt you?
    he says what next a skill physical mental?


    Blind people don't see black, they see the same thing you see out of your elbow - VengfulScars

  18. #18
    λεγιων ονομα μοι sycld's Avatar
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    I'm impressed.

    And that sycld dwarf is more like an aspirational sycld than a rl sycld (developing comradery with hippos isn't easy).

    I tried playing the game with the graphical overlay a short while ago, but it still was too formidable for me to get into. The learning curve seems incredibly steep.


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    If you don't like them, then get the fuck out.

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    Atheists are quite right

  19. #19
    Senior Member Infernus's Avatar
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    still waiting on that update

  20. #20
    Strangle Hazard thank mr skeltal's Avatar
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    also waiting on that update Tryin to make a change :-\

  21. #21
    Senior Member Infernus's Avatar
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    Where's that update?

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