Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: Wondering if I'm with the right person...

  1. #1
    can't post; too scared Anonymous's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    350
    Credits
    309
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)

    Default Wondering if I'm with the right person...

    It's kinda hard for me to put my thoughts into words, and this situation isn't helping, so bear with me.

    I've been with my girlfriend for four years. We had our problems through the years but we've worked through them and I'm generally happy with her. We've been living together for a good three years now and a few months ago I proposed. Everything was fine for a little while after that but lately...I don't know whats going on. More and more these little things she does start annoying me. Things she did that I used to think were cute or quirky are now starting to look stupid to me. Her jealousy, which was mildly tollerable, is now almost on the verge of insanity.

    Normally, I'd just keep dealing with this my way (keep it all inside because that's the type of person I am and I've been though similar situations before) but there's a twist this time.

    We have a friend who we've known for as long as we've been together. I'm not going to lie, from the moment I met her I've found her extremely attractive. I pushed those feeling aside because we were both in relationships. However, the more we all hung out the more I started seeing that she and I are more in tune with each other. Recently, me and her had a chance to hang out alone (something that never happens because of my girlfriends jealousy) and we got very close. In addition to realizing that we had a lot more in common than I thought all the old suppressed feelings came back out. Some stuff happened that night (no sex, no kissing) and while it did weird us both out, we both agreed that it felt really good.

    I have no clue what I'm supposed to do or think. Four years is a long time for me (longest relationship I've had is this one) and there's a lot invested; but I don't know if I'm making the right decision by staying with my fiance. Our friend is having issues with her relationship right now but I doubt anything would happen between us if I just up and ran to her...I think.

    I really need some help here...

  2. #2
    cowabunga
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Pennsylvania
    Posts
    4,424
    Credits
    2,319
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    I'm not sure anybody can really help you with this to be honest. It's a bad situation because no matter the choice you make, you're losing something that could have been.

    That being said, do whatever it takes to make yourself happy.

  3. #3
    ...let's go medieval! Gas Meter's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    St Andrews, Scotland
    Posts
    28
    Credits
    182
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    This is a really tough decision, as faesce has said. You need to think of the possibilities that maybe this new girl is just a phase? Maybe if you left your fiance, you would regret it?

    Maybe it's worth talking about with someone close, like your parents, or an uncle or aunt? They can be of great support in times like this.

  4. #4
    Band simonj's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Thicket of Solitude
    Posts
    9,881
    Credits
    1,939
    Trophies
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    You're probably not with the right person. Otherwise you wouldn't be doubting yourself.

    There's something to think about.

  5. #5
    I loves sausage festival! djwolford's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    In a television
    Posts
    7,186
    Credits
    724
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)

    Default

    I'd almost bet that the best thing to do is stay with your girlfriend. I had a similar experience, decided to end things with my fiance and girlfriend of five years, and ended up regretting it. Just be sure to think this through very well before you make a decision, and be sure to think with your brain instead of your penis.

    At the end of the day this isn't the kind of problem that anyone else can solve for you though, you're going to have to make the call here.
    Quote Originally Posted by Toki
    Oh, gives to me opposites werewolves that turns to humans whens the moons comes outs!
    Quote Originally Posted by Toki
    We's not goes downs that dusty roads again!
    Quote Originally Posted by Pickles
    Toki is that straight vadka? It's not even noon...

  6. #6
    feel like funkin' it up gwahir's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    margaritaville
    Posts
    6,539
    Credits
    2,788
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)

    Default

    PLEASE DON'T TAKE ANY ADVICE IN THIS THREAD EXCEPT FAESCE'S.

    Nobody, and I mean NOBODY on the internet can give you any half-decent advice on whether to leave or stay. We know neither you nor the girl. Act in your own best interest, because that is the only fair thing to do to your fiancee (she wouldn't want to stay with someone who has regrets his whole life, I mean).

    The bottom line is that you should not marry someone you are not completely happy about spending your life with. You need to give that some real thought.

  7. #7
    can't post; too scared Anonymous's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    350
    Credits
    309
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    I want to say thanks to everyone. My initial suspicion was correct and I'm going to have to take some time to sit and think about this.

    Interesting note: A few days ago the other girl came to me for advice. It seems she's gone and gotten herself into a similar situation. If only she knew how wrong it was to ask me for advice.

    Again, thank you everyone.

  8. #8
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    74
    Credits
    197
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    I feel the same way sometimes, "what would it be like being with someone else?" but then when I actually see my fiance and hang out with her, I never feel that way, and only want to be with her. Shes a huge part of my life that I would really miss if something happened. Dont do it unless you are sure that you no longer love her. Maybe try going to new places with her, trying different things in bed, whatever you feel is lacking in your relationship, try to talk to her about it. If she doesnt want to listen, then maybe she isnt "the one". But seriously, think before you do anything because with many girls, once you leave, you cant come back.

Similar Threads

  1. Wondering about gun lubrication? Don't know how to lube?
    By bacon ops in forum The Great Outdoors
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 01-17-2009, 02:58 PM
  2. Am I the only person that didn't like [REC]?
    By llFidoll in forum Entertainment Alley
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 10-15-2008, 07:08 PM

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •