work stress

Hello internet.. I am a self confessed stress machine workaholic crazy bitch. I'm a university student and convinced that it shouldn't be this much of a stressful experience despite being at a top uni (so obviously work load is going to be higher) but I feel consumed by stress to the point where I now have no personality or life. Am loosing weight (I guess a good thing but not healthy) despite eating loads of food and just spend all my time studying (to give you an idea I probably work 8am - 10pm on a normal day with 2 eating breaks). I'm at a uni which is renowned for being quite abnormal in terms of social life (I've been out three times this term which has been 7 weeks) and the work load is insane (approx 12 articles at 20 pages each per week, one novel and one book - and that's not including 3 essays per term and 3 in class exams per term), but surely there must be some way to be more efficient with time? Classes are so intimidating, everyone is from private school and then I just make some comment with my stupid accent and sound like an idiot. And do you think it will be worth it to graduate and get a good job?
I miss my smile :(

Get a big ass calendar for your wall, and write down important dates like exams, essay due dates, etc and use that to plan out your study time. Sounds like at least for a while you might even want to plan in set meal times to make sure they happen. With the exception of exam study times, block out every Friday night (and Saturday morning for recovery) for party time, go out and get blitzed. You're in college, you're supposed to go get drunk, have fun and do stupid things - because you won't have this opportunity again. If you want to be more clinical about it, instead of calling it "getting laid", refer to it as "work-life balance".
If you have trouble finding parties, if you're in the dorms just stick your head out into the hall and shout if anyone knows of a good party this weekend (someone will), or just go walking on in the street until you find a house bumping music and just walk in. If you don't know anyone that's ok, just be chill and if questioned say you got the wrong house but didn't leave because it seemed like a good party, laughing, and they will probably tell you to stay if you're being respectful of their place. If you are a female you will never be questioned in the first place.

The calendar is a good idea. An idea that you will forever be able to use to manage your time, not just in college.

Get some friends, go camping or hiking one day. Just something to get away and relax. No deadlines, no essays and no worrying. Then get back to work.

I have a feeling that the stress you put yourself under isn't going to stop once you get out of school. It happens to a lot of us. Got a job? Okay let's get that promotion! Got the promotion? Ok become the best and get the next promotion! Learning how to deal with it now is going to help you for life. The calendar idea is great, but what else can we do? I like Evernote or even a notebook. I can put shit in it then forget about it. Another thing I don't have to worry about because I have it on paper or on a digital device.

Now I know some people who don't worry about shit until they step in it, but for the rest of us we have to learn to manage it so we don't have an aneurism.

Hmm thanks guys. I think the idea of the calender is good but I'm already v organised with my time (keep a filofax and a calender) so I'm not sure. My issue is that my to-do list is so endless, I always feel like I could be doing more and the workload is so vast that I never feel as if I have accomplished anything. So when I do socialise I just feel really guilty and either a) get too wrecked meaning I am inept for 2 days, subsequently making me more stressed, or b) go home early. My uni has more postgraduates in it than undergrads meaning most people here aren't looking for a typical college experience and also it is very international so a lot of people don't drink/ go out etc (I don't want to generalise but it is true). It is also so competitive - the only word I can think of to describe the environment is corporate and I don't feel people are really here to make friends. I need to get a grip really and sort myself out..... I feel a bit lame so thank you for listening to my consistent moaning :)

Try changing the way you socialise. Going out and getting wrecked can be very destructive to many uni students, even though others thrive on it. There's no 'right way' to blow off steam. Try replacing nights out getting hammered in the club with something a bit easier to deal with, going to watch a movie or going to dinner with a couple of friends, maybe. This will mean you're giving yourself a chance to get out of your head for a night but you won't be so out of it that you ruin your productivity.

There are more extreme things, too. If you talk to your doctor then they might be able to put you on some anti-anxiety medication - this will help with the stress but might have negative effects too so be careful. They might also be able to put you in touch with a therapist. Sometimes talking about your problems with a professional can be a huge, but often overlooked, help.

There may be a provision for free therapy at your school. Having someone insightful and professional (and removed; i.e. not a friend or invested in your wellbeing) to talk to can be all you need. I know that's a super general piece of advice, but there's not much anyone here can do about shrinking your workload, and since we don't know your specific study habits, or the ins and outs of what you're studying, I doubt there's much advice we can give to help you study more efficiently.

Have you considered dropping a class and taking it during the summer? I understand that this is sometimes difficult with financial aid and having a minimum amount of hours but some financial aid is flexible with how many hours you take and when they're taken.

Uni work will always be hard and there isn't really a way around it. You've just got to find a balance that suits you.

By this I mean, find the balance of working and not working, as in, don't do it all. This sounds a bit stuipid but everyone does it. Do you need to read every page of every article? Use sticky notes for novels and books but flick through to find 2 or 3 quotes that you can use in class. Quality not quantity. 3 well developed points are worth more than a list of contents of the books youve read.

The more specific stuff is for assessment, but again target your revision or coursework to something you know a bit about/have an interest in and it will come easier. Develop a few points in detail to show knowledge as well as creativity in giving your own argument.

As your course progresses, you'll probably find something you want to specialise in and your work will all focus around similar points. Don't be afraid of this. If this is your first year, it might seem like a lot. But first year is a buffet with bits of everything. Second and third years are where you get what you want and its easier to handle.

Don't worry about your accent. If you develop a single point well in front of private schoolers who have spent the last week in the library and are struggling to remember every word of a book, you will be fine. Especially if you thought of that point after a 20 minute read with a cup of tea followed by whatever you want to do. Then if other people make points, link it back to yours. Hey presto you've used their strength against them.

I am in my 3rd year, and I have not been out once this term. I'm going out tonight, but will be home by 10 probably. My housemates and I spend every night playing Monopoly (sad right?). Not getting hammered every other night doesn't mean you have no social life. You just have to fit a social life with your work and remember not to panic, the worst thing that will happen is youll get a bad mark in a test. If that happens, you try and beat that mark next time. If you find yourself stressing out, put your pen down and go make lunch. Eat right, relax right and working will come just as easy.

I really don't want to get therapy, I have an academic advisor here but if anything he doesn't think I do enough. Ahh I dunno, I eat loads but it's just not going anywhere. But thanks for the advice guys, I do need a better balance. I went to this jazz gig tonight so that's a start :)

I didn't go out more than twice in my last year of uni.
I smoked a shit ton of green to substitute though.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by ShitFace

I smoked a shit ton of green to substitute though.

---

I hate to condone drug use(I'm actually serious about that, considering my past and current use), but this is an easy way to deal with stress. Sometimes, though, it doesn't work out all too great, you may get paranoid. But if you've ever smoked and it made you relax, getting a bag may be able to help with stress. Plus, it's cheaper than therapy.

also cheaper than alcohol