Not Long

I wrote this a few weeks ago, and in the margins of the paper I have some notes to it, one of the notes states "No rhythm, no meter, no organization, terrible" so apparently when I wrote it I didn't like it, I'm rereading as I'm typing, so my thoughts may have changed(but probably not)

Not Long

Jealous of everyone I talk to,
Angry that I'm not depressed,
Hatred towards the fact I'm moving on.
Seems someone had a change of heart,
Not long ago you wanted nothing to do with me,
Oh, how the tables have been turned.

Drop your woes on me,
And expect me to care,
Tell me your problems,
To gain a little sympathy,
Tell me I don't understand,
Try to tell me I just don't know,
Don't know what you're going through,
Not long ago I was destroyed,
And look what's happening now.

Jealousy seeps through your words,
At the mention of another girl,
Can't be happy without me,
And it was your idea to change,
To stop being lovers, to stop loving.
And be nothing more than friends.

Ask me another loaded question,
So I can pull the answer when it's against your head,
Blame me for your heartache,
When fault is sitting on your shoulders,
This shouldn't be so funny to me,
But your emotion has changed,
And it's plain for all to see,
Not long and you'll be the one crawling back,
This time, I'll be the one holding the dagger.

Never thought, that the victim,
Would be healed faster than the assailant,
Never thought the wounded,
Would wake from this nightmare.
Not long ago, I was walking misery,
And it's easy to see, you took that yoke from me.

I never thought I'd revel,
In someone else's pain,
Not with something as dear as this,
You heart has warmed back up to me,
All it took was for me to stop caring,
And treat you like everyone else.
And I was your knight in shining armor,
Treated you like the goddess I thought you were,
And you said that it could never be enough.
Not long ago did I think,
That you and I were meant to be,
Not long and I won't care what you see.

A sad poem, kinda, but the subject, you, came out on top. I think it's well done for getting out your message and letting the reader know something about you.

Do you like to write a lot of poetry? I use to, but I haven't in a while because I just like to write poetry in all sorts of free verse. I think when I do that I'm not a very good poet, so I kinda started studying poetry in my free time so I can make my poetry seem much more spectacular.

I used to write a lot of poetry. If I could find all my old notebooks I could get a detailed view of how it's evolved over the years. When I started writing I had a lot of anger and hatred coming out of my words, slowly it evolved to less anger, and some easier emotions.

Now, I write about my struggle with drugs(mainly heroin), my use(shown in a positive light), and the most emotional shit to me right now, which is getting over and still having to deal with the ex-girlfriend, who is now regretting her decision to break up with, and cheat on me during my jail sentence.

I think what I may do is type up all of the poems I have in the notebooks I have stashed away, and also take some of the shit I've written online, and try to list it all in chronological order. Just to give an idea of how my writing has evolved.

Over the past 7 years(from age 17 to January) I didn't write as much as I used to. Because everything I wrote would eventually end up getting read by my girlfriend. Most of my work wasn't about her, but because of the dark tones and subject matter, she always would start a fight over it. Funny thing was, I never invited her to read any of my work, so that was one of the largest breaches of trust I had with her(aside from her sleeping with other people). I hope that now, since I don't have to worry about someone taking my subject matter too personally, I will end up writing a lot more. You'll just have to deal with 7 years of pent up aggression towards my ex for a little while, eventually I will get back to writing less personal stuff, and probably get back to something that is more general and understandable. That will probably be about substance abuse, though, because that is something that is close to me, and something I've devoted a lot of my time to over the years, so it's the most easily accessible subject I can write about.

There will be some random love/hate poems about certain people, shit dealing with my family(I have a few pieces about my relationship with my father, and his family), but that's what I think the general idea of my new work will be.

As I write new stuff, it'll be posted here. If it's in my notebook, I write shit in the margins and I'll usually let everyone know what I think the most important note was in there(in the case of this piece, it was that I didn't think it was very good)