In-Laws

So last weekend I couldn't make it to my parents' house for a weekend cookout, and because of that I missed my sister and brother-in-law. It isn't exactly a rare thing for me to miss out on family things, I sort of keep to myself, but I really enjoy holidays and the like.

So anyway I get home and there's a call from mom on the answering machine saying they missed me blah blah wish you were there, etc. and at the end of the message saying (with a heavy sigh) that "..your brother-in-law said that he'd be coming down to take you out next weekend whether you like it or not.."

Now don't get me wrong, normally this would be cool. But I can't fucking stand my brother-in-law. He's annoying, has physically abused my sister in the past (which almost ended in a divorce), and whenever we DO hang out, he winds up cracking a sexual jokes about my sister, and has a knack for calling my own father an idiot to my face, to which I've said many choice words and made plenty of threats.

I've kept these things secret from the rest of the family, because while I hate his guts, my sis has two little girls, and while he does seem like a douche, he treats them really well, and I don't want to cause drama in the family that could have bad results.

So anyway, the weekend starts tomorrow, and I really don't want to see or hear this guy, but at the same time I feel like I have to be nice and accepting since he's part of the family. Would it be right for me to tell him to leave me the fuck alone? Or should I just bear it as he takes me out to 'entertain' me? I mean he is family regardless, and I feel bad for brushing off family.

Another point is that he hasn't called me all week about this weekend, so I'm getting like zero notice about where we're going or when. And there's no way I'm calling him (he never gets the hint when I avoid him). That alone is enough to get out of it this weekend, but I really would like to.. you know.. NEVER hang out.. hah :(

What do you guys think?

Pity repl....oh it's PS.

Just don't go. Get a few excuses ready (get your friends to help you with alibis if necessary) and tell him you've already got plans. You don't have to be a dick about it or anything, just explain to him that it's not your fault you're busy, after all he didn't bother to arrange anything properly. If he becomes too insistent then just calmly explain that you'd rather not and then stay away.

I guess the worst scenario in this situation is that you spend a night hanging out with a cunt. Surely you've had worse nights. If you do end up having to go then just be positive and optimistic and try and keep control of the conversations (stick to vague topics like sports/music/current affairs etc. and don't let it turn too personal).

Wake up at 7:30 on saturday and sunday and leave your house for the day, don't return till after dinner.

Or ask him to go see a movie with you. If you can't stand him, put him in a place where he isn't supposed to talk!

I'd go and try to be nice, but if he starts doing what you say he usually does, just set him straight.
Don't flip out, but be firm and be like look man, thats not on you can't say those things, etc etc.
He is family so you are going to be seeing a fair bit of him from now on, so if I were you, I'd try and set him straight, or at least to get him to withold himself from saying those things around you.

Why do you put up with that? "Hey me and your sister were boning last night and" "Dude that's between you and her. I don't want to hear about it."

"Man your dad is an idiot!" "Could be worse, he could be a cunt like you."

It's not going to go very far to keep peace but it should at least make him stop doing that crap in front of you.

I agree with Atomic. Assholes like that get away with shit because other people let them. They're bullies that never grew up. Of course he'll get pissy if you correct him or set limits on what you will and will not tolerate as bullies are always right too, but tough shit. It's your life and you decide what you will and will not deal with.

Let me tell you I'm not a violent guy but if some fuckshit looked at my sister like a piece of ass and then went on to insult my dad, my fist would be so far down his throat that I could grab his asshole and turn him inside out. Is keeping peace worth more to you than your family being treated with respect?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Atomic

"Man your dad is an idiot!" "Could be worse, he could be a cunt like you."

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lol'd

Well I don't have much experience on this type of thing but in my experience try not to flip out because last time I did my Dad and Step Mum didnt speak to me for almost half a year, all because I flipped out at my step mum crackin jokes about my own mum, so as you can see it can sometimes cause more harm then good.

Have you ever tried talking to him or your sister about it? coz maybe he just needs a wake up call if he's going out of his way to speand time with you he must enjoy hanging out.

Seriously, this guy sounds like he just needs his ass kicked. Anyway, odds are that the rest of your family feels the same about this ass, so I'd just take him to one side and tell him you'd rather guzzle acid then hang out with him. If he's not too slow, he'll take the hint and leave ya alone.