Im about to fucking kill this guy..

So one of my room mated buddies is a fucking douche. He will always come over and if he does, he always ends up sleeping on the sofa.

The other night I was home by myself and I hear some noise in the kitchen. so I go with my pistol to find him in the kitchen saying he needed to charge his phone. He had a new charger in teh package and his phone, so Im pretty sure he wasnt lying about that.

Then my brother noticed one of his hats missing. I asked this guy about it and he said he didnt know, then I find it on the table after he leaves and the size was all fucked up.

And he is currently asleep on my sofa. He was not here when we went to sleep. So basically he just invited himself, used the spare key to get in, and slept in my fucking house without even letting us know he was going to. And get this. His house is like half a mile away.

Rape is the only answer.

Well it's probably a good time to let him know that he's getting shot the next time he invites himself in. Just tell him that from now on, you're assuming that he's there to burgle and rape you.

Right now I have to deal with one of our friends from last year who left my school but came back this term. He has been sleeping and living on our couch. I mean this nigga doesn't ever move he just lays there. He is on the edge of getting kicked out of our house if he doesn't actually put effort into getting an apartment. He sits there and smokes our weed but never throws in. I found out last night that he had $40 and spent $35 on 2 grams yesterday during the day with another kid who never throws in. Then when me and the 2 other kids who throw in got home, we had to buy more and he only had $5 left. Fuck bums on the couch man.

I don't tolerate that bumming shit from anyone except for my really close friends, who I know throw money when they got it, and bum when they cant. If you have money but don't throw in on the drugs, you are a douchebag. I used to live with a guy who would never match up. Ever. Then he got pissed one night when we smoked without him, while he was upstairs, smoking his stash that he doesn't share. This guy also broke a $400 bong and never owned up to it and eventually stole some money and pot from us. We ended up stealing some money back and his scale. Then a week ago one of my buddies invited him over last week and he took his scale back. We're planning on inviting him over soon and taking a pipe and space case off him that one of my other buddies paid half for, but he just took them when he moved out. Then once thats all over with, I intend to never see this kid again.

I think you need to chill out, so he's crashing there for a few days. He's your house mates buddy.
You'd let your friends crash there, so what's the problem?

Seems like the problem is the guy isn't respecting their shit.

Hide the key in a different spot and don't tell him where it is.

i don't think any murder will be necessary... just tell your roommate you don't like his friends staying when there's no-one else around...?!

At least your guns won't be for show anymore?

PS post vids.

When my friends friends are douchebags you know what I do?

Smack a bitch.

Tell him to get the hell out of your house.

You don't have to allow that.

Take it up with your roommate.

all i got from your story is that you really want to use your worthless guns

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ShitFace

I think you need to chill out, so he's crashing there for a few days. He's your house mates buddy.
You'd let your friends crash there, so what's the problem?

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No the problem is that he just came to my fucking house uninvited and didnt even let anyone know he was here. And just crashed on my sofa. Didnt even try to call. Just came over here and crashed. Make sure you remeber that his house it less than a mile away. And my room mate doesn't even chill with him much, hes just a smoking buddy,

So I wake up this morning/afternoon and he fucking sleeping on the sofa again. And I know he wasnt invited or let in by anyone, because I was the last one to go to sleep.

Is he bigger than you?


Doesn't matter, you have big guns. :huhu:


edit: fuck it doesnt work.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by jack burden

Take it up with your roommate.

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This.

If you don't either tell the guy that this has to stop or tell your roommate to talk to him, he's going to assume that it's cool.

point the gun to his balls and make him a dancing queen

I always instate a few couch laws:

1) You spend more then 2 nights in a row on the couch, you're paying rent.
2) You have no rights whatsoever. You cannot touch the remote, the tv, the stereo or the fridge without consent.
3) Anything ends up missing, you get your ass whooped.

if only he had tits....

Take it up with your roomate and the bust a cap in his ass. Also REAP can't get enough RAEP.

Tape a knife to his neck and ask him if he's straight

Jerk off on his face while he's asleep and then deny it. He won't come back again. You don't even need to really jerk off. Just use some diluted cream cheese or something.

Real upside to this idea is that he might lick it, like the taste and turn gay.