The other day at work...

There was a lady drinking shots at the bar, I guess she had about 8 shots in like half an hour, and she was really hungry. So she went around to tables begging people for money so she could buy food because she was hungry. One of the managers talked to her and told her she would have to leave if she didn't stop.

So when the manager wasn't looking she would go to tables that hadn't been cleaned yet and pick from them (even the meat from eaten wings). So the manager told her to leave, but on the way out she passed out in between the two front doors.

So the manager and a few guests had to carry her out, placed her on the sidewalk off to the side of the restaurant, and then locked the door.

Good times.

You're among friends :)

Does anyone have any interesting stories about things happening at their workplace?

Interesting things? How about the state paying a cab so piss poor people can come and get their painkillers so they can get their buzz.

There's one of many stories I find funny, but nobody else would understand.

At the bar I used to work there was a guy getting a blowjob in the corner booth. The guy turned out to be my friend's boss. She taunted him about it and got fired. Then she sued them for unfair dismissal and won £5000.

That's pretty cool for the girl..

One of my old managers (he got a better job) was sleeping with three of the servers... dating them all at the same time.
They found out (eventually) and met him when he was on a date (with someone completely different) and poured red wine all over him. It was interesting to see..
I never go to that restaurant but the one time I did I got to see that so it was pretty awesome..

In my city there is one street for the hookers called Manchester Street. Yeah, my work overlooks a wee ally way off that and when I'm working my shift on Friday nights I always see a hooker sleeping with a guy. Always different hookers, always different guys, sometimes a girl.

But there are a few regulars.

Well we're getting an Auger microprobe system running so that we can determine the surface chemical composition of our samples. The turbo pump wasn't running up to full speed, so I had to unscrew its flange from the system and replace it with a gasket.

So now in order to remove it from the system, I had to unscrew the cooling water lines. When we replaced them, water was just spraying everywhere.

It turns out that I forgot to put in a couple washers!

And not only that, but the problem wasn't with the turbo pump in the first place: it was a poor seal on one of the copper gaskets in the load-lock LOLOLOLOLOL

Quote:

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Originally Posted by sycld

Well we're getting an Auger microprobe system running so that we can determine the surface chemical composition of our samples. The turbo pump wasn't running up to full speed, so I had to unscrew its flange from the system and replace it with a gasket.

So now in order to remove it from the system, I had to unscrew the cooling water lines. When we replaced them, water was just spraying everywhere.

It turns out that I forgot to put in a couple washers!

And not only that, but the problem wasn't with the turbo pump in the first place: it was a poor seal on one of the copper gaskets in the load-lock LOLOLOLOLOL

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That reminds me of the Steve Martin bit (I think it's from the album 'Let's Get Small')

Ok, I don't like to gear my material to the audience but I'd like to make an exception because I was told that there is a convention of plumbers in San Francisco this week - I understand about 30 of them came down to the show tonight - so before I came out I worked-up a joke especially for the plumbers. Those of you who aren't plumbers probably won't get this and won't think it's funny, but I think those of you who are plumbers will really enjoy this...

This lawn supervisor was out on a sprinkler maintenance job and he started working on a Findlay sprinkler head with a Langstrom 7" gangly wrench. Just then, this little apprentice leaned over and said, "You can't work on a Findlay sprinkler head with a Langstrom 7" wrench." Well this infuriated the supervisor, so he went and got Volume 14 of the Kinsley manual, and he reads to him and says, "The Langstrom 7" wrench can be used with the Findlay sprocket." Just then, the little apprentice leaned over and said, "It says sprocket not socket!"

Just yesterday an employee showed up drunk and faked a heart attack. An ambulance was called, He admits to the EMT that he had been drinking, But I guess the guy was having some kind of blood pressure and heart issues because they took him to the hospital. I think the "heart attack" was a red herring to divert attention from his drunkeness. But I guess it worked because everyone is talking about him and hoping he's OK, but no one is talking about the fact that he was drunk and acting belligerant. When he was first confronted about his irratic behavior, he tried to just walk out of the office and drive away, when he saw that some other people had followed him and were blocking his car door he climbed through the hedge around the parking lot and tried to walk away. They were able to coax him back into the building and that's when he decided he was having a heart attack.

I knew something was up because when the guy first got to work he called me in the Q/C lab and was trying to order a taco for lunch. He thought he was calling the cafeteria and just couldn't understand when I explained he had the wrong extension. I came up to the front office to see the spectacle when the ambulance came and as they're wheeling the guy out on a stretcher I hear him moan "I just wanted to get a taco!".

Thats why you never drink alone.

I get a lot of smashed people here at the hotel on new years and St. Patty's day, and I love how they hand me their plastic magnetic keys as if I can divine which room they're in. I once helped a drunk lady to her room and as soon as the door shut, I heard a loud THUD and a groan. I knocked on the door and asked if she was alright but no reply. Bitch didn't even tip me.