Wallabies Getting High off Poppy Crops

Unlike their larger mainland cousins, the wallabies of Tasmania appear to be more trippy than Skippy. No lesser an authority than the island's attorney general has discovered that hungry marsupials and thousands of acres of legal opium poppy fields do not mix.

"We have a problem with wallabies entering poppy fields, getting as high as a kite and going around in circles," Lara Giddings told a budget hearing on Wednesday.

Nor does the problem end there. Even drugged-up marsupials, it seems, cannot break free of the physical law that demands that what goes up must come down.

"Then they crash," said Giddings. "We see crop circles in the poppy industry from wallabies that are high."
British animals appear to be more conservative in their choice of intoxicants. Last October, a drunk pony called Fat Boy had to be rescued from a Cornish swimming pool after gorging himself on fermented apples and falling into the water.