Thread: My Name Is Khan [2010]

(Plot spoilers follow, but frankly even if you haven't seen the movie I wouldn't be concerned. It's available for streaming on Netflix, FYI.)

This emotional movie led me to a more profound moment of catharsis than I thought was possible from cinematography. This film made me transcend beyond the realm of hope towards serenity and acceptance.

It really made me think:

"A movie this critically acclaimed could not possibly get any worse. It's impossible that human beings could be that stupid."

Oh, but it was. And they are.



My Name Is Khan is the very unlikely story of an Indian Muslim man named Rizwan Khan (played by Shhahrukh Khan, Bollywood's most popular "actor") with Asperger's, who is sponsored by his brother to come to America. Here he meets a Hindu window and her son that he falls in love with and eventually marries.

In this alternate universe version of America, Indians apparently are the largest group of recent immigrants, and half of the population speaks Hindi. Also, there's apparently a version of We Shall Overcome in Hindi that, like, everyone knows.

But of course, we can't forget about the main plot point, around which the whole movie revolves. Khan was picked out upon his arrival to America for further inspection by menacing evil white security officials. He was butt-hole searched (whether a sufficient amount of lube was used was not addressed). All because his name was Khan, and presumably also because with Asperger's, his mannerisms were abnormal and appeared to be those of someone with something to hide.

After this, the stereotypically child-like aspie made a goal for himself: to shake the president's hand and tell him, "My name is Khan, and I am not a terrorist." However, Bush with his white evilness always seems to elude Khan's efforts to speak with him.

In addition to marginally offensive stereotypes of people with Asperger's, there are also some funny stereotyped black characters, such as a rather stout "lawdy-lawdy" mammy and her son, an Alfalfa impersonator Khan called "Funny-Haired Joel." As most black people do, they live in a wooden shack in the coastal town of Wilhemina, GA, whose population numbers in the hundreds and is exceeded by the number of cows. This section of the Georgia coast, by the way, is mountainous and right next to the South's great desert.

The moment of catharsis comes when this small collection of huts, inexplicably built in something resembling a shallow crater, is ravaged by a hurricane. Even though the hurricane is apparently just a rather heavy downpour, we see dead people lying face down in the ground and terrible devastation. All the black people are holed up in the town's church, and even though the water is no deeper than about the waist of an adult, they cannot leave the church, probably because black people die when they touch bodies of water.

And every major news outlet in the country, again half of which are in Hindi, all report on this one little group of shacks.

But don't worry: in the end, Unnamed Black President-Elect saves the day.

Even though this is the most egregiously horrible moment of the movie, soap-operatic, uncommitted performances by Khan and his female co-star Kajol are consistently cringe-worthy throughout the film. Other plot points are just as ridiculous as those above, such as Bush's "Christians-only" charity dinner, from which Khan is barred.

The message is quite clear: though not all whites are evil and prejudiced, many whites have become hate mongers because of 9/11, and the distinction between these two kind of whites is, well, black and white with no gray areas in between. Many black people are oppressed by the whites as well and cannot survive prolonged contact with water. Black President Elect heralded a new era of understanding and peace in America. And every man with Asperger's is a saint and engineering savant.

And because it's so very politically correct, the white movie critics had to give it plaudits for its "fairy tale like" treatment of such a controversial issue. I would've instead called it heavy handed and absurdly, moronically unreal, but hey I guess that's why I'm not a movie critic (also you gotta be white).

Even if you can't quite stomach watching this 165 minute film in its entirety, My Name Is Khan is a movie that everyone should at least watch partly. The lesson it has to teach us through its puerile plot, horrible performances, and yet somehow widespread critical acclaim will stick with you for a lifetime.