Have a bunch of guys line up for a 100 meter dash where at the finish line is a giant funnel. I do mean giant, so big that it is enough for 12 guys to line up side-by-side to ejaculate comfortably which is what they'll be doing. The winner will be the first one to drop about 20 oz (that's 1 aquafina bottle) of splooge into the funnel where at the other end is you, Captain Castle, with your lips planted firmly around the end piece.